One day, Doug came into the kitchen laughing so hard he could barely stand up. There were tears streaming from his eyes. "Your baby is so funny," he said.
"Why? What happened?"
He proceeded to tell me a story. You see, Roxie has a toy phone. It's a very smart phone. About ten seconds after you put it down, it rings. That way the kids stay interested.
So the story begins. Roxie went into the bathroom (the master bathroom, Doug was in our room watching the whole thing) and put the phone on the counter. She got ready and just as she was climbing onto the potty, the phone rang. What is a girl to do? She climbed down and answered it. "Hello? Hi! How are you? I'm fine, thanks for asking. Bye." She put the phone down and ran back over to the potty. No sooner had she climbed up than the phone rang. A little exasperated, she climbed down and answered it. "Hello? Hi. How are you? I'm fine, thanks for asking. Bye." And she ran back to the potty. She climbed up and - you guessed it - the phone rang again. Who could it be this time? But, she dutifully hopped down and answered the phone, having the same conversation as always, this time while doing a potty dance. Doug said she did this about ten times before she realized that she could bring the phone with her. She did so and was finally able to find relief while chatting.
A few days later, while we were at the gym waiting for the big kids to finish their JiuJitsu classes, Roxie decided she needed to go potty. I let her go in the stall by herself. It was her first time. She went in, did her business, and flushed. Then, in a panicky voice she said, "MOM, THE WATAY!" (She doesn't say her R's. She replaces them with an AY. It just wouldn't be the same if I told you she yelled WATER.) No sooner did she say it than I heard the water spilling over the top of the toilet and on to the floor. Apparently the previous user of that stall had used too much TP.
"Open the door!" I screamed.
"THE WATAY!" she screamed.
"Unlock the door!" I screamed.
"THE WATAY!" she screamed.
"Unlock the door!" I screamed.
"THE WATAY! THE WATAY!" she screamed.
Finally, I screamed louder and she regained focus for just long enough to unlock the stall door. I scooped her up and had to run downstairs and tell the big muscle-men at the front desk that the potty had flooded.
Never a dull moment with the potties, I tell you.
5 comments:
Oh, my. And I thought this was going to be a post about bad language!
Poor little mite! It seems like there was another incident with her and a self flushing toilet on your blog. She's going to have issues.
That magic toilet story of yours is a classic. Why is it that Doug is always around for the funniest potty stuff?
She is the Potty queen, or the queen of the potties. I don't know which.
I love that kid, you should have another.
Hilarious! the phone always rings when i'm indisposed, too. Of course, my girls let the caller know just what's going on--no embarassment there, right?
too dang cute!!! i can't wait for those stories!
I really did Laugh Out Loud at this one, made my night!
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